Ia R'lyeh pipe smoke ftaghn!

Great Cthulhu takes a break from driving artists and poets insane. I don't know how he manages to light a pipe under the ocean, but I suppose if he can get his fireplace to burn, then the pipe isn't much more difficult.

via Lovecraft eZine

Blending

Here's what I've thrown together to smoke for the time being:

1 part Latakia
2 parts burley
4 parts Virginia
4 parts Perique

Nice, but I think I'll increase the latakia.

UPDATE: I changed my mind. The leaves are beginning to meld now and the latakia has asserted itself just a little. I'll have to give it a few more days before I make a decision on this blend.

Today's work

Today I made a trip to the only tobacconist in the city (that I know of): The Humidor on San Pedro Ave. I have run out of all my favorite bulk tobaccos and I don't wish to smoke too much of my "good stuff" all at once, so I bought some various bulk leaves to whip up some of my own concoctions.

I bought 2 ounces each of Virginia and Perique and 1 ounce each of burley and Latakia. Before leaving their parking lot, I whipped up a quick pipeful of Perique mixed with C&D's Gray Ghost for the drive home. I enjoyed it quite a lot, and it was a good, long smoke. I have smoked Perique straight before, and enjoyed it, although it isn't something I want to do too often. However--and I should preface this with in my experience--straight Perique is difficult to burn. It works much better with a little something extra to more or less serve as an accelerant. The Gray Ghost is on the dry side and worked very well.

I also purchased a bunch of bristle pipe cleaners and a small container of Zippo lighting fluid. This stuff is hard to come by around here. I used to be able to buy it just about anywhere, but now no one stocks anything but butane. I think I might get a butane lighter eventually but I want to make sure I get a really good one that will last a long time, so I'll have to start researching that.

Upon arriving home, I mixed another very small sample with some of all four leaves and am enjoying it right now. Later on I will mix bigger samples and allow them to meld for a while before smoking. Right now it's just nice to have some decent bulk tobacco again.

And finally, I dropped off a pipe that needs a stem replacement. It is a pipe that I rescued from an estate lot and have never smoked because the stem was so badly damaged, but when I get it back I'll be sure and write something about it--after I've had chance to smoke it.

The end of an experiment

Some years ago I put up several batches of tobacco in vaccum-sealed bags, and eventually smoked all except one which somehow got pushed to the back of the cabinet and I overlooked it. Later I rediscovered it and decided it would be a good candidate to test long-term tobacco storage in vaccum sealed bags. So I put it back and decided to wait.

I did this because although I asked in different online forums about it, I got only replies such as, "I don't think it will work because..." or "it might not work because..." or "sounds like a good idea! let me know how it goes..." No one ever gave me an unequivocal yea or nay on the subject.

So let me now tell you, after 4 years and 3 months of storage: It does not work. So if you're thinking about this method for long-term storage, forget it. You will only waste your tobacco.

The tobacco in question was 2 ounces of C&D's Bayou Morning. Upon slitting open the bag, the tobacco had hardened into a near rock-like chunk. Small pieces could be chipped off which immediately fell apart into a nearly dust-like powder.

And that's that.

Featured Pipe Smoker: Lord Nibbler of Eternium (fictional)

Lord Nibbler of the planet Eternium is a fictional character from the animated series Futurama. He is a member of a very cute and adorable race with voracious appetites who are extremely long-lived (having lifespans of thousands of years).

"Nibbler" is only the cutely ironic nickname that his human companions have given him, ironic because he is capable of swallowing animals whole that are several times his own size. His real name is never given, because as he once said, "in the time it would take to pronounce one letter of my true name, a trillion cosmoses would flare into existence and sink into eternal night."

Throughout most of the series he appeared to be a semi-intelligent being who made simple animal sounds of chattering or warbling, would purr like a cat when his fur was stroked, and had a litter box for pooping. His feces are made of dark matter, "each pound of which weighs over ten thousand pounds," and was originally able to power space ship engines, although later on dark matter was rendered inert and could no longer be used as such. It is unknown if Nibbler is actually not potty-trained or if he simply prefers pooping in his diapers.

Later in the series, he revealed himself to be the extremely hyper-intelligent alien that he is, and when he desires to do so, can communicate with his human companions in a very deep, booming and well-modulated voice.

It was Nibbler who had the main protagonist, Philip J. Fry, cryogenically frozen so that he would be present in the 31st century because Fry was the only being in the universe capable of defeating a race of hyper-intelligent brains who were going to destroy the universe.

His race is called the Nibblonians by his human companions, and he and his kind also refer to themselves as such for the sake of convenience. The Nibblonians are the oldest race in the universe; at the time of the Big Bang they were already 17 years old.

In the episode from which these screen captures were taken, Nibbler discovers that the cats of Earth are actually a race of intelligent aliens who are going to destroy the Earth in order to save their own planet. He and his human companions succeed in foiling the cats' plan, although after they save the Earth they discover that the planet now rotates opposite from its original rotation, meaning that the sun would be rising in the west. This, they decide, is "close enough."

In the last picture above we see that Nibbler's pipe allows him to retain a quiet dignity even while having his diaper changed.